The Oxford English Dictionary just picked VAPE as their word of the year, and now Dictionary.com has released THEIR annual word of the year . . . and it's not quite as cool.
They picked "EXPOSURE." How annoyed must they have been when the Oxford people went for "vape"?
Dictionary.com's editors say "exposure" sums up so much of what happened this year, from people worried about exposure to Ebola . . . to the ice bucket challenge getting exposure for ALS . . . to celebrities being exposed in hacked nude photos.
They based their pick off Google searches and the searches on their website. Their word of the year for 2013 was "privacy" . . . so clearly they're into picking generic words that take on new, modern context.
The runners-up for the Dictionary.com word of the year were borders, disrupt, wearables, and bae.
There are probably better strategies to get a night out with your buddies than THIS. In fact . . . pretty much EVERY strategy is better than this.
22-year-old Justin Sarten of San Tan Valley, Arizona wanted to hang out with some SKETCHY dudes on Thursday night . . . so he started texting his girlfriend that he'd been KIDNAPPED.
She told his mom, who called the police. And they launched an all-out manhunt for him.
Eventually they found him at a Walmart with three guys. At first he said he HAD been kidnapped. But he couldn't keep his story straight, and eventually admitted he'd gone with them voluntarily, and they gave him money to buy them cell phones. (???)
None of that fully adds up, but it REALLY feels like a bunch of guys up to no good. Anyway, Justin was arrested for falsely reporting a kidnapping.
Do you have trouble taking pills? Maybe not aspirin, but those giant horse-pill vitamins? Well, scientists have FINALLY figured out the best way to do it.
Researchers at the University of Heidelberg in Germany found these are the two best ways to get pills down smoothly, without any trouble.
1. The "pop bottle" method. Put the pill on your tongue, tightly wrap your lips around the mouth of a water bottle, then tilt your head back slightly and SUCK the water down. That will create a vacuum that gets the pill down.
2. The "lean forward" method. Sit in a chair, put the pill on your tongue, take a sip of water, and as you swallow it, tuck your chin and lean forward.
Both methods should work for most pills, but the researchers say the "pop bottle" method is best for chalky tablets, and the "lean forward" method is best for denser capsules.
41-year-old Tamara Thomas of Stone Mountain, Georgia was at a grocery store on Saturday when she dropped her debit card.
She couldn't find it, and says it stressed her out so much she got a headache . . . so she went across the street to a Family Dollar store to buy some aspirin.
So she got in line behind a 32-year-old guy named Kahlif Buggs and his 11-year-old son, who had a giant shopping cart full of toys.
And when it was time to pay, he whipped out his card . . . which Tamara immediately recognized as HER debit card. The guy claimed it was his . . . apparently he didn't notice Tamara's PHOTO was on the card.
When she pointed that out, he took off. But Tamara chased after him and called 911 . . . and the cops found Kahlif hiding behind a church. He was arrested.
Have you looked at what it costs to buy a new iPhone WITHOUT getting a two-year contract? They start at like $800. So if you buy one for someone as a gift, that's love. If you buy MORE than one? I can't even comprehend.
A guy in Guangzhou, China wanted to propose to his girlfriend in the most spectacular way possible this weekend . . . so he bought 99 brand new iPhone 6s, arranged them in a park in the shape of a heart, and proposed inside the heart.
And . . . she said NO.
The guy spent approximately $82,000 on the iPhones, which is about what he makes in TWO YEARS as a computer programmer. He'll probably be looking to resell the phones now.
There's no word on WHY his girlfriend turned him down.
After years of speculation, Disney announced that there will be a fourth "Toy Story" movie . . . and it even has a release date.
Unfortunately, it's WAY into the future. In fact, you still have time to get married, and CONCEIVE A CHILD to later take to the theater with you to see the movie. You just have to get that done by June 16th of 2017.
When it finally premieres, it will have been SEVEN years since "Toy Story 3" . . . and, as hard as it is to believe, 22 years since the original movie came out.
There's no word on a plot for the new one. As you may recall, at the end of the third movie, Andy went away to college and gave the toys away to a little girl.
The director says, quote, "'Toy Story 3' ended so perfectly that for a long time, we never even talked about doing another 'Toy Story' movie. But when [we] came up with this new idea, I just could not stop thinking about it . . .
If you've never heard of the beer mile, it's because you're a good person. If you HAVE heard of it, sit back and smile while we share its glory with the rest of the world.
The beer mile is a challenge that combines two polar opposite things: Running fast and chugging beer. Here's how it works. You chug a beer, run a quarter mile, and repeat until you've run a full mile . . . and in the process, chugged four beers.
Well, the beer mile is actually making some news now because a 44-year-old mother of six just broke the women's beer mile WORLD RECORD . . . by 13 seconds.
44-year-old Chris Kimbrough of Austin, Texas just ran the mile and chugged the four beers in six minutes and 28.6 seconds. The previous woman's record was set in 1997 by a woman who did it in six minutes and 42 seconds.
The men's record was set earlier this year by 34-year-old James Nielsen of San Francisco . . . he did the first beer mile under five minutes, at four minutes and 57 seconds.
This is pretty weird, but if your name happens to be Elizabeth Gallagher, you have a ton of free time over the holidays, and you have a high tolerance for weirdos, it's your lucky day.
A guy named Jordan from Toronto, Canada recently got dumped by his girlfriend . . . Elizabeth Gallagher. And they had an amazing around-the-world trip booked for the end of the year to Milan, Prague, Paris, Bangkok, and New Delhi.
Well . . . Elizabeth isn't going on the trip with Jordan anymore. But he already paid for the ticket, it would cost him too much to cancel it, and he can't change the name on it.
So he's put an offer out on the Internet: If your name is Elizabeth Gallagher, you can go on the around-the-world trip for FREE. He says it doesn't include hotels and you don't even have to hang out with him in the different cities.
He also says he's not expecting anything in return . . . but, quote, "if you feel compelled to toss me a couple hundred bucks, great. Really the only thing I ask for is that you enjoy this trip and that it brings you happiness."
So if your name is Elizabeth Gallagher, email Jordan at email@example.com. The trip starts on December 21st from New York and ends January 8th in Toronto. Jordan thinks you might need a Canadian passport but we think you'll be fine with a U.S. one.
Not to justify committing crimes, but this is one of the all-time great excuses for a robbery.
18-year-old Zachary Torrance of Hueytown, Alabama was arrested last week for robbing four different Subway locations in four days.
And when the cops finally tracked him down, he said he did it because he'd tried the JARED DIET, it didn't work, and he was upset . . . so he wanted his money back.
In case somehow you've forgotten, Jared Fogle is the chubby guy who lost a ton of weight about 15 years ago by eating two Subway sandwiches every day. And he's been in 17 billion commercials since.
Zachary has been charged with first-degree robbery. He's about six feet tall and 200 pounds, so we're not sure why he was trying so hard to lose weight . . . but I guess everyone has their own health ideals.
Let's say you're out driving this week and a ZOMBIE walks in front of your car. Even though you KNOW zombies aren't real, and you KNOW it's Halloween . . . you just MIGHT be inclined to run that zombie over.
45-year-old Jeffrey Stiles of Muskegon, Michigan was at a Halloween party on Saturday night dressed as a zombie. And around 8:30 P.M., he decided to go into the street to scare DRIVERS . . . even though he's really old enough to know better.
So Jeffrey walked out into the street . . . and was promptly RUN OVER.
The driver kept going, and the police haven't tracked him down. Jeffrey was taken to the hospital with non-life threatening injuries.
According to a new CareerBuilder survey, 28% of us have used a fake excuse to call in sick to work this year. And 31% of bosses say they've tried to CATCH employees faking it. 15% say they've even driven by someone's HOUSE before.
Here are the eight weirdest excuses employers have heard so far this year. Some of them sound TOO weird to be fake.
1. "I just put a casserole in the oven."
2. "My legs fell asleep in the bathroom. Then I stood up, fell, and broke my ankle."
3. "I was at a casino all weekend, and still have money left to play with."
4. "I woke up in a good mood and don't want to ruin it."
5. "I hooked up with someone at their place last night, and I don't know where I am."
6. "I got stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store."
7. "I tried to dry my uniform in the microwave, and it caught fire."
Around 2:20 in the morning on Saturday, a cop was standing on the street, talking to a bus driver near a bar in Mankato, Minnesota. (About 80 miles southwest of Minneapolis.)
And the bar had just closed, so drunk people were pouring out of it, including a 24-year-old guy named Riley Swearingen, who was with some friends. And apparently just to get a laugh, Riley decided to sneak up behind the cop . . . and give him a WET WILLY.
More specifically, Riley went with a DOUBLE wet willy . . . meaning he put a finger in BOTH of the cop's ears at the same time.
At which point the cop spun around, and saw him walking away. And if he wasn't already sure Riley did it, he was a few seconds later . . . when he clearly heard him yell to his friends that he, quote, "just gave [that] cop a WET WILLY!"
It turns out Riley is an air traffic controller in the Air Force, and was in town for a friend's wedding. Initially, they charged with him "assaulting a police officer with bodily fluids," which is a FELONY.
But after three days in jail, a judge let him plead guilty to disruptive intoxication instead. So he ended up with time served, and had to pay $77 in court costs.
I love it when people decide to sue . . . but have to tell an embarrassing story in order to do it.
Back in 2011, a 61-year-old woman in Dublin, Ireland named Isabela O'Sullivan had her bathroom renovated, and got the walls redone with huge tiles that weighed about six-and-a-half pounds each.
Then about two weeks later, she was using the bathroom when one of the tiles came loose, and shattered on the floor. And it scared her so much . . . she fell OFF THE TOILET, couldn't get up, and had to call a friend to come help her.
According to Isabela, the fall hurt her knee so much that she can't go on long walks anymore. So she sued her contractor over it, claiming he didn't install the tiles right, and it was HIS fault she fell off the toilet.
And a judge agreed with her . . . and just awarded her $32,000 for pain and suffering. Plus, the contractor has to pay more than $3,000 to cover the cost of replacing all the tiles.
It's really amazing when we were all young and drunk we didn't wind up getting arrested. Or, if we DID get arrested, the Internet wasn't sitting there waiting to spread the news and mock us relentlessly.
A guy in Indianapolis was arrested for underage drinking Saturday night . . . it happens, and normally wouldn't make the news.
Except that around 2:00 A.M., two of his buddies, 20-year-old Hanni Bichir and 19-year-old Triston Burton, went to the police station to get him.
And when they got inside, the cops could tell THEY were drunk too . . . and arrested both of THEM for underage drinking.
Hanni blew a .161 on the breathalyzer and Triston blew a .135. The cops gave explained to them it was a bad idea to go to a police station drunk and put them in jail . . . where they were reunited with their buddy.
There's a guy in Canada who got mauled by a grizzly bear this weekend . . . and that was arguably only the SECOND worst thing to happen to him that day.
A 56-year-old guy was out hunting in Fernie, British Columbia on Sunday morning when a grizzly bear ATTACKED HIM. As he tried to keep the bear from tearing his body apart, another hunter saw what was happening and ran over to help.
"Help" is a loose term here, though . . . because when the other hunter tried to shoot the bear, he accidentally shot the GUY.
Somehow, the guy survived both the bear attack AND the human attack . . . and he was airlifted to a hospital where he's in stable condition. His injuries aren't considered life threatening.